Here we are at the end of November and at the end of my current improvising project.

For each day in November, I sang/recorded at least one 3-minute improvisation. I allowed myself two takes of any idea and but I posted the selected song with no edits and shared compilations of the weeks here on this blog. (Watch week 1, week 2 and week 3.)

The songs from the final 9 days were varied and more than one the song I posted was the only song I created for the day. With three weeks practice, it seemed the music came more easily, or perhaps I simply trusted my instincts more. I still had to negotiate the camera (the first time I did this project, I only posted audio), but filming the videos added an artistic element and challenged me to interact with the surrounding space in ways I hadn’t in the previous 30 days project. In fact, the songs from last Tuesday, Thursday, Sunday and today were all created away from home.

Sunday’s song happened while visiting the “Say Their Names” art installation. The installation is near George Floyd Square in South Mpls and hosts representative headstones for numerous Black people killed by police throughout the United States. My singer friend Mankwe from the Give Get Sistet held space there weekly from July to October and I participated in many of those sessions (Music with the Ancestors).

I was (am) also considering the myth and erasure driving the Thanksgiving holiday and feeling challenged by celebrating a holiday and occasion that many of my Indigenous/Native friends finding galling and painful. In the spirit of mourning and remembering, I once again visited this “cemetery” in south Mpls. The sun was setting and the beautiful willow still held some leaves. I recorded a song to post and then lingered to speak the names. I finished as the sun was setting.

It was then that I realized that this particular 30-day singing project was part of a continuing search for how to create and develop my own rituals and ceremonies for healing. Sending you light and songs as you practice and/or locate your own.??

Over the past two years (basically since the murder of George Floyd in the city where I live) I have begun talking to my students about the PURPOSE of singing.

It can be easy in teaching settings to focus on the “how”” of singing and forget to focus on the “why.” Why do you want to sing?

This week had me thinking about my own answers to that question. Wednesday (Day 17) is my long/late teaching day (i.e I was tired) and Friday (Day 19) was when I learned about the Rittenhouse verdict (I was sick and tired). And it was challenging to care about this project in those moments.

But here’s the thing … singing (music-making) changes how I feel. Sometimes it makes me feel markedly better, sometimes it moves me deeper into sadness and grief, and other times, it simply allows me to begin to process or name what I am feeling. Singing every day this week helped me do all of these things (even on the days when I didn’t wanna 😉).

Looking back on the first time I did this project, I remembered how much administrative work this project involved in 2010.

I was only recording audio, but I had to upload everything to this blog, which meant writing a post about the music every day and sending an email message to my subscriber’s EVERY day. (Of course, many of those emails simply said, “Here’s today’s song,” but still …) Social media and smart phones have wildly simplified sharing for me, but I am posting here on my blog and emailing a weekly update because I know not all of the folks who follow me hang out on social media.

Due to the nature of social media, however, I realized that I haven’t been sharing as much about how the songs came to be and when I looked back to the 2010 project, that information was really interesting and useful to me. With this in mind, I decided to make some notes about song experiences this week.

And in this post, I want to talk about the song from Day 8.

Day 8 is the “Yeah” song. (It’s the first excerpt in the video above.) I think the video I posted was the 4th or 5th song I recorded on Monday. I kept hitting record and singing for 3 minutes, but I wasn’t happy with what was coming out.

Now the earlier songs weren’t bad, (but it didn’t feel like they were good, either *wink*) I simply knew I hadn’t landed on what I wanted to do or say. That might make it sound like I have plan for these songs; I don’t.

Most of the time, I click the little record button on my phone and open my mouth to see and sing what comes out. But as I’m singing, I can usually feel that the song has a narrative or a shape that feels cohesive (most of the time) and/or complete. (That’s how I knew the one and only song I recorded on Day 9 was the one to share.)

I heard Toshi Reagon say in a live stream I watched this weekend that author Jacqueline Woodson told her that “When you have a writer’s block, it’s because you’re not writing about the right things. … Anytime I’ve stopped writing, I’m like let me kick myself in the right gear because there must be something I want to say and I’m just not looking in the right directions.”

Honestly, I can’t say what sparked the shift I made on Monday, but I knew about 3 seconds in that this was the direction in which I wanted to go. *smile* And if I hadn’t record the 3 or 4 other songs, I might not have cleared the path for this song to find its way through.

…

The video above is a peak at the songs from week 2.

You can watch each song in its entirety on my Facebook music page (you don’t need a FB account to access) or on IGTV and follow me at one of those places to watch the project unfold.