As you may recall, I challenged myself to get things started this year. And, well … starting is not my strongest skill.

Fortunately (?), the Universe is providing plenty of opportunities to practice.

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The start of a new semester always leaves me a little frazzled. There’s the syllabi to update, the lessons to plan and outline, the handouts to update and copy, and the students to schedule.

Throw in 45 middles school kids, some private students, a workshop and a gig or two and I can start spinning.

Once I get new things in my calendar and start my new routine, it’s all good, but all of the “Should I teach 2 days or 3 days” and “Should my teaching day start at 10 or 11?” wears me out.

This “fatigue” is part of what keeps me from starting in the first place.

But, it’s not really the starting, it’s the deciding and the promising.

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When I add something to my schedule, I am making a promise to be there. And that can make me think twice (or four or five times *smile*) before adding things.

This contemplation has its pros and cons. Sure, it is sensible to take a few moments to reflect on how adding a new commitment will impact my “whole” schedule. And I have learned that cramming in too many last minute items can make me feel scattered and unfocused. But sometimes for me, this reflecting can turn into inaction.

(I’m working on that.)

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A friend of mine (who knows me well *smile*) sent me a blog post whose title was Tattoo Thinking. The post talked about how most of the decisions we have to make are much less permanent than a tattoo. Yet we (okay, I) agonize over them.

We act as though the consequences of many of our decisions are IMPORTANT, when really, if we send the email today or tomorrow; go to the bank before or after the grocery store; do the laundry Monday or Thursday – it will hardly matter in a week or so. (We also forget that not deciding is a decision. We’ve decided not to decide.)

But we can make everything seem so permanent.

During the start of a new semester I have to remind myself frequently that putting something on my calendar doesn’t mean I can’t reschedule it later if I need to. (I’m not breaking a promise, I’m rescheduling an appointment.) That saying no to a single request in service of my whole schedule (and sanity) is allowed. That rearranging my schedule to add projects I really want to do is good.

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Most important, in order to start, I am letting go of being precious.

You know, precious — wanting everything done a certain way in a certain order at a certain time. The hand-written note with the hand-made gift, the dinner or cookies from scratch, the perfect new student welcome packet or blog post or newsletter design.

Part of my work on starting things is letting go of being able to pick the most efficient, effective process at the start.

Sometimes there isn’t enough information at the beginning to do this. Sometimes you just have to get moving until a way appears. And, while I’m very comfortable with this idea when I sing, I still struggle to embrace it in the rest of my life.

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As I traverse the new year, whenever I am tempted to spin, idle, over-think, overproduce, hem or haw, I tell myself, “This is not a tattoo.” And whenever I think I would get started on that blog post, grant proposal, set list, etc. if only I had more time, I say to myself, “Don’t get precious, get started.”

This will be the fifth time I choose a keyword for the year. As I have said before, for me the process of finding my keyword is the important part. Spending time reviewing the year behind and thinking and daydreaming about what I would like to accomplish in the year ahead have become significant steps in my planning.

I’m particularly interested in how the word points me a direction which often turns out to be somewhat different from what I thought I was planning. (This has stopped surprising me. After all, it happens all the time when I sing spontaneously.)

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Here’s what I mean.

Last year, I chose the word CREATE. As is common for me at the end of 2011, I was feeling the need to get off my keister and “plan” for the new year. I picked CREATE with visions of performance and recording projects dancing in my head.

And I did create things in 2012, just not so many performances or recordings.

I thought my focus would be performing, but it ended up being teaching. I created workshops and lesson packages and began work on another blog (more on that soon).

All of that creating was important. Developing these new teaching “products” allowed me to put new systems in place in my “business” and, more important (and more fun!), to meet and teach new singers.

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Still, I remember having to give myself permission to move in the teaching direction a number of times over the year. “This isn’t what you’re supposed to be creating!” my inner critic scolded. But, any time I tried to move in another direction, I felt like I was forcing things and it just wasn’t working. (Note: this doesn’t work when you improvise either. *smile*)

See, one of the things I discovered during my time working in publishing is that, for me, some things have a time and season.

I might struggle and struggle to gain traction on a project and then one day — poof! — it just isn’t a struggle anymore.

The task doesn’t get easier or go away, but, suddenly, I can see a way to accomplish it. More important, I have the energy to accomplish it.

Perhaps my subconscious has fiddled with it long enough to find a solution or a plan of attack. Maybe other priorities have shifted, maybe I just got a good night’s sleep, but somehow this project that had been impossible is now … well … possible.

So when developing and scheduling lessons and workshops seemed easy and figuring out the performing/recording stuff didn’t, I took a cue from my past life and did what was easy.

(Hey, there’s a reason water follows the path of least resistance. And lest you think doing what’s easy is lazy or cheating, remember that over time water can wear away rock.)

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Right. Back to this year’s keyword.

So like I said, it usually takes me a while to find my keyword. I ponder and rifle through words, try them on and discard them. It’s a process. I think abstractly (or big picture) about what I did in the previous year and what I feel like I need to attempt next and then I start to gather words that seem connected to that idea. After a while, one of the words will resonate. I feel that “click.”

This year was different. About the middle of last month, I began thinking about thinking about my keyword. (*smile*) After all, it was December and I typically reveal my keyword in January so I knew I should set aside some time to “work” on it, but I hadn’t yet.

During a holiday visit, my family asked me about this whole keyword “tradition” of mine. Did the word change over the year or did I change my interpretation of the word based on the year. (Both. *smile*)

My dad asked me if you had to wait for the right word to come to you or did it happen instantly. I explained that for me it usually took a while, but I thought if you had a strong, visceral and immediate reaction to a word, well, then that was probably your word. (And, just like that, my dad found his word. Show-off. *grin*)

Then my brother-in-law joked that his word for the 2013 should be “finish.” I blithely chuckled that finish did not need to be my word.

“I’m a very good finish- er.” I said. “Ha ha, my keyword for 2013 needs to be … ”

Uh oh.

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As a friend of mine says — when I know, I know.

My keyword for 2013 is START.

“Start – to set moving, going, or acting; to set in operation; to establish or found; or to begin work on”

I know START is my word because I had a strong, visceral and immediate reaction, more like being hit over the head than a click (plus it made my stomach hurt). Those of you who know me know my … er … challenges with starting.

I struggle, I stutter, I spin, I stagnate. (And, yes, I survive.)

Part of me is (more than) a little terrified that START is my keyword. But as my mom says “you should do something that scares the hell out of you every five years or so.”

So in honor of year five … time to START.

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Looking for your own keyword? Here are some ideas:

share, focus, explore, allow, release, start, finish, relax, birth, flourish, savor, simplify, balance, dare, prosperity, plant, discover, nurture, wellness, creativity, discipline, perform, shimmer, power, authenticity, beam, be, imperfect …

I have heard about this singing event from a number of singer friends and wanted to share it with you.

At 4:00 pm CST this Friday (12/21/12), you can join the world in singing a song … well … for the world. *smile*

As it says on their web site:

“One Earth. One Voice. is a global campaign mobilizing 15 million people to sing in synchrony on December 21, 2012. Calling world leaders to end the violence against the earth, the One Earth. One Voice, campaign is harnessing the unifying power of song as a response to our planetary crisis.”

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Being a community singer, I love the idea of people singing around the globe. (And I’ll certainly be thinking of my European singing family of singers Friday).

And if you can’t sing the song at the exact time on Friday?

Well, I know it is likely that I will be in rehearsal for the Winter Solstice: Night Vision Service on Friday afternoon, but I feel confident that we’ll sneak in some time to join world in singing. (Ooh, what a nice idea — that the earth herself might sing, too! *smile*) Of course, we might not get to sing during the designated time, but I think that’s okay.

I have a friend who told me that prayer is out of time; I believe that songs (which to some of us are prayers) can be, too. So sing the song when you can — today, tomorrow, a year from now — and it will still add to the global choir.

Visit the One Voice. One Earth. website to find out more and learn the song.